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We’re all superheroes

It was literally the last place on earth I thought I would be judged for my screaming child, but there I was in the mother’s room of a shopping centre being stared down with a look of disgust by someone who was supposed to be on my side… another mother!

Firstly, my daughter isn’t a brat, she’s teething. See how I just felt the need to explain myself to you guys, even though I shouldn’t have to.

The thing that has certainly shocked me the most since becoming a mother, or actually even since I was first pregnant, is the pressure, comparison and judgement passed upon you by those that are supposed to know better. It seems pregnancy and motherhood come with right to tell people what you think or ask them questions which would once be considered intrusive.

Your belly is too big. Your belly is so small. Are you having a natural birth? Did you have an epidural? Are you breastfeeding? Breast is best. Has your child done this yet? Your baby eats a lot. Your baby doesn’t eat enough. Are you back to your pre-baby weight? Are you back at work? Does your child watch TV? Do they go to day care?

Why is it that as women and more so as fellow mothers some feel the need to belittle the parenting or decisions of another? I’m here to tell you screw all that!

Screw the mother who was looking down on me in the mother’s room because my child was tired and crying. Screw those who look down in shame on you for having an epidural or an elected cesarean – it’s your child birth and you are free to choose how you want your baby to enter this world. There’s no medals for a completely natural birth let me tell you. Screw those who tell you ‘breast is best’ – in my opinion, fed is best! As long as your child is not starving and you are giving them nutritious milk, you’re doing a better job than what you think!

Screw those who tell you your baby/belly is too big/too small. Little do they know you’re worried about how little your baby is or on the contrary that you’re self-conscious of how much weight you’ve gained.

It’s time that we as women become more supportive of each other rather than competitive – and that goes further than pregnancy and motherhood. How about we just start empowering each other full stop.

In this day and age it seems woman are getting bitchier and bitchier. We go on and on about this alleged sisterhood but does it really exist or is it just a facade? Enough is enough! Let’s celebrate each other, each other’s children, each other’s achievements, each other’s triumphs, each other’s success. The world has enough chaos, why add to it?

Real queens fix each other’s crowns

How about we stop ripping each other’s off?

And men, don’t be sitting there shaking your heads thinking “woman”. I have seen some of you act bitchier than woman – so get your act together too.

There’s plenty of room in this world for everyone to be successful and happy – wouldn’t that be a dream?

It’s time to put an end to the judgement, let’s stop the hating on each other in fear of someone being better than us. We are all on the same journey here as mothers and it’s about time we banded together and celebrated each other for taking on the toughest job in the world. Like really celebrated each other from the deepest pit of our soul. Because we are all pretty fricken amazing when you think about it. We create, carry and raise those little humans, no matter which way you choose to do it.

We are all superheroes in our own right and it’s time to start making each other feel that way!

To all the superheroes – much love,

Conveniently compassionate

Conveniently compassionate – we are all guilty of it. But why do we do it? Why do we wait for something awful to happen to show people we care?

I know, I know, we are all busy – we have work, kids, school drop offs, gym, countless appointments, social life, egos and the rest – but really? We have time for social media, our favourite TV shows and online shopping don’t we?

Truth is everyone is fighting a battle we know nothing about. And even though selfishly at times we may think our battles are greater than others, it all relevant to the person experiencing it. What we may perceive as a non-issue could be something catastrophic to someone else.

So in short, be kind!

Make time to check on those around you, just because. You never know the battles someone else is facing silently. By reaching out and showing compassion, you could quite literally be someone’s saving grace. I know the power of this firsthand as I was fortunate enough to be picked out of the darkness by  a handful of those close to me and the impact for me has been immeasurable – I will be eternally grateful to those people!

And, aside from myself , I too have witnessed those close to me experience tremendous hardship which has opened my eyes and heart to a greater level of compassion and empathy.

With that in mind, if someone acts out of character and treats you badly, instead of being quick to judge – which is the most common reaction, try and understand life from their shoes – what happened to this person to make them act this way? What battles have they faced to get them to this point?

Empathy and compassion are two of the most powerful emotions known to man and yet are such rare qualities in this day and age. If each of us make a conscious effort to exercise a little more of both, the impact would be considerable.

Empathy is about finding echoes of another person in yourself – Mohsin Hamid

Someone’s story may not be the same as yours, but doesn’t mean the pain is any different. Empathy is about finding that connection with someone to truly understand how they are feeling.

We are all humans at the end of the day and thrive on giving love and being loved. Life is too short to wake up with regrets, make time to show those around you, you care. You never know just how much it could change someone’s day.

Sending so much love and light to all reading this. And, my email is always open to anyone who wants to reach out.

 

The best ever chocolate cake!

I am usually a sucker for lemon, banana or carrot cake BUT, when I came across this recipe shared by Rebecca Judd a year or so ago, I decided to give it a whirl and let’s just say it very quickly became one of our family favourites!

This is literally the easiest and most delicious chocolate cake you will ever make AND, its flourless – winning!

I love that this recipe is simple and has minimal ingredients, making it perfect to whip up with the kids. This was Alaia and I’s first baking experience together and we had an absolute ball.

Give it a shot and let me know what you think in the comments below.


Ingredients

200g almond meal

200g drinking chocolate (I used the Cadbury one)

200g butter (room temp)

200g caster sugar

5 x eggs

Method

1. Lightly grease a round spring form tin

2. Preheat oven to 160 degrees fan forced

3. Place all ingredients in a bowl and mix until combined

4. Bake for 40 minutes….done!

I love to enjoy warm with some vanilla ice cream or just on its own with a sprinkle of icing sugar.

Enjoy!

The courage to be you

Isn’t it crazy that I considered not uploading this picture as I thought it was unflattering?  It really got me thinking, is this the kind of example I want to set for my daughter – being so self critical? Hell no!

I am a size 12 which latest research shows is the Australian AVERAGE – so why do I sometimes feel ashamed of my body? I have an hourglass figure and a bigger bust than most so naturally look a little top heavy but does all that justification really matter? No. Why do we as women find it so hard to be comfortable in our skin? Why are men exempt from this kind of judgement and scrutiny? I am not saying they deserve it, but why are we the only gender always under the spotlight.

We are so polluted as females with images of what we ought to look like – yet are these images a true representation of the mass population? I don’t think so. First being super skinny was all the craze and now it seems the bulkier big booty look is taking the lead. And now consequently, those on the lighter end of the scale are being bullied too – madness!

Why do we scrutinise ourselves or worse still why do we criticise each other as women when we are supposed to be in the same tribe?

Every single one of us is beautiful in our own way, whether it be a size 6 or a size 16, Kardashian booty or not. And believe it or not, each one of us is an inspiration to someone! There is someone out there looking up to us just the same way we are looking up to someone else.

Its time to stop self sabotaging and loving ourselves for exactly who we are and where we are right now! Because self love is the first step to progression and global acceptance.

Sure, if you want to change something about your lifestyle for health benefits, that’s totally fine – but do it for you and no-one else. By constantly comparing ourselves to others, we are robbing ourselves of true happiness. Forget who the world tells you to be and be who you are!

So, if someone hasn’t told you today or more importantly if you haven’t told yourself, you are beautiful! Don’t forget it.

Let’s top the negative self talk and instead teach and empower our daughters to love themselves just the way they are – because that’s really what we want for the future generation isn’t it?

What things to do you truly love about yourself? 

 

Alaia’s wardrobe: our top six brands

Now there’s no denying it, my daughters wardrobe has quickly surpassed my own – dressing girls really is as fun as everyone says! I always get asked where I buy Alaia’s clothes from so, I’ll definitely make this a regular segment on my blog. But, to begin with, I thought I’d kick off with a rundown of our top six brands/stores.

Seed Heritage

I absolutely love Seed for both girls and boys. Their ranges  ooze style and are both modern while cute. While admittedly their full price items can be a little on the pricier side, I am a firm believer in you get what you pay for and their clothing always washes well and therefore does last the test of time – which will know is important with kids.  With that being said, if you are price conscious, sign up to their e-newsletter because their online and in store sales are just RIDICULOUS and I always score myself (well, Alaia) a bargain! I also love their gorgeous shoe designs which start from pre-walker right up to bigger kiddies.

Country Road

Think classic, simple, stylish and quality without being overly babyish, I head to Country Road for Alaia’s wardrobe staples – like jeans, long sleeves and jackets as they fit like a glove.  Similar to Seed, their items are a little pricier but can’t deny they do wear so well. And the boys range, don’t get me started on the boys range! Mamas with little men, this has to be my favourite for your little studs, so if you haven’t already – be sure to check out their range. You’ll have him looking like Prince George in no time.

Pictured right: Alaia wears Country Road frill detail tee, charcoal jeggings and soft jacket. Boots are from Seed. 

Cotton on Kids

I’m sure this is already on every parents shop list – Cotton on Kids. They have really nailed it with their ranges and prices! Great for every day staples and even those semi-dressy pieces, I stock up on basic tees and tights from here for Alaia all the time. They fit well and are always at affordable prices. Again, sales here are FAB but you have to be quick because they go like hot cakes.

Pictured left: Alaia wears Cotton on Kids basic jacket and black basic tights. Booties are from Fawn + Finch. 

Rock Your Baby

Want your little girl to stand out from the crowd? Then this is the brand for you. I just adore Rock Your Baby! Their pieces are quirky, whimsical and fun while still oozing femininity.  Their pieces are definitely suited for special occasions or make the perfect gift for any little miss.  Quality wise, they are brilliant – thick plush materials make their pieces premium quality. They do also carry a boys range but I can’t comment on this as I haven’t had any exposure to it.

Pictured right & header: Alaia wears older style ‘pom pom romper dress’

Moda Bambini

Armani Baby, Chloe, Hugo Boss, Roberto Cavalli  – these are just a few of the fashion brands you will find at this hidden gem. Moda Bambini is a small boutique located in Osborne Park, Western Australia and is my go to for very special occasions or special gifts. Only downfall to buying gifts from here is I always end up walking out with way too much for Alaia – oopsie! Given the designer labels, it is relatively expensive however you will still find brands such as Fox and Finch. Definitely worth a visit and the sales here are excellent with sometimes up to 75% off!

Pictured below: Alaia wears denim and tulle Fox and Finch dress, floral Chloe dress and Monalisa dress far right. 

Fawn + Finch

Now we can forget about those little feet now can we. Hands down favourite shoes for Alaia are from Fawn + Finch. With an extensive range premium soft cow leather, these little shoes not only look good but also last the test of time that is, childhood! The customer service is fantastic and I really need not look anywhere else as they have me well covered. There are imitators on the market, but they just don’t compare!

Pictured below: Alaia’s  Fawn + Finch t-bar moccasins and bootie collection (minus two)  

fawn and finch shoes

Happy shopping!

What are your favourite clothing brands/stores for your little one?

 

Your biggest critic

If there is anything I have learnt in my 30 years, it’s that we are often our own harshest critic.

For years, I was so self-conscious, lacked confidence in my professional ability, was anxious socially, always felt guilty for saying no (even if it’s what I wanted to do), beat myself up incredibly when I made a mistake and in general took too much on board of what people thought about me. Experience, mistakes and maturity have certainly changed me – and that is for the better!